Making a speech at a person’s wedding is an honor. It is a chance for you to let the couple know how much they mean to you. The couple is putting their faith in you. They believe that you will speak about them in a personal and entertaining manner. All that pressure can be extremely stressful! There are dozens of examples of bad wedding speeches in movies, television, and even in real life. No one wants to give a bad speech (or hear one for that matter). Here are some tips to make sure your speech is exactly what it needs to be.

Plan Ahead

The key to writing a successful wedding speech is to start working on your speech early. Waiting until the last minute for a speech is never a good idea. Even the best improvisers struggle with speeches in the moment. Even “speaking from the heart” sounds better if it has been rehearsed. You can get a better idea of the beats and the length of your speech. The earlier you start the more you can change. You can put your best foot forward with a speech that is not a first draft.

Be Personal, Be Funny, Be Gracious 

Teetering the line of being sentimental and funny in a speech can be tough. You want to give a good anecdote without crossing a line. You want to get the guests choked up without getting uncomfortable. Choose memories that can thread that needle well. Avoid being mean for the sake of the joke. Remember that this is a celebration of love and should still be respected. In all instances, be gracious. Thank the hosts, the guests, the venue, and anyone else you feel needs a shout out. It takes a lot to put on a wedding so express your gratitude. This is also a good buffer in case you end up crossing a line. If you are concerned about a part of your speech, run it by someone. You do not want to be “that jerk” on the couple’s wedding day. 

Keep It Concise

No one likes a long speech. Keep it short and sweet. It is always better than a long winded speech.

Practice Makes Perfect

The first time you do the speech should not be at the wedding. You should practice saying it out loud to yourself as much as you can. Put the speech on your phone and run through as many chances as you get. Practice with a trusted friend. They can give you edits or help you figure out the speech’s pace. The more you practice the more prepared you will feel on the day of. That being said, you can still make mistakes on the day of. We are all human so we all will flub a word or two in our time. If you practice, it will help you recover better since you know what comes next.

Don’t Overthink It

Even though a wedding speech is a lot of responsibility, you do not have to overthink it. You are showing your support so no matter what you say you will be successful. Be encouraging and thoughtful and the rest will follow. All the guests are cheering for you to do well. No one will judge you even if you mess up. The wedding is about the couple; not about your speech. Stay calm and do your best.