Choosing to write your own wedding vows is a beautiful way to personalize your big day. However, when the time comes to actually put pen to paper, you might find yourself feeling stumped! And, if you start googling, you’ll find so many ways you can go about this task that you might feel even more intimidated by all the advice. Luckily, we have a few of the answers…In this short guide, we’ll show you a simple but impactful approach to writing your own wedding vows. 

Simple Wedding Vow Guidelines

Start with ‘I love you’

Let’s start with the basics. Before you delve into the vows, you need to tell your partner that you love them and show how much you care. This part of your wedding vows may be somewhat emotional. Don’t forget those three little words.

Explain how your partner has changed you 

When someone important comes into your life, they change you. They teach you things you never knew about yourself or, on a more practical level, share new skills with you. Take a moment to consider what your partner has done to open up your world and thank them for it. Draw upon your differences, but state them as strengths you can both use to move forward in your newlywed life together.

Give a personal anecdote

Your wedding vows should be as wonderfully unique as your romantic relationship, so make things a little personal. You might want to tell a sweet (but short) story about how you met or speak about what makes your relationship unique. You don’t have to talk about the big things here. Instead, you can draw upon the everyday quirks that you love. Show that you notice and embrace the small idiosyncrasies that make your partner uniquely them!

Make realistic promises

At the heart of this speech are the lifelong promises you make to your partner. While you should vow to love, honor, and cherish them, there’s room to make these promises more grounded in your daily lives, too. For example, you might want to say that you will always watch a certain TV show with them or that you will always support their favorite football team. Adding a sense of realism to your vows makes them more meaningful. This makes your vows a set of daily actions, instead of lofty, undefined ideals.

Thank them and look to the future 

Finally, you’re going to want to thank your partner for being who they are and loving you unconditionally. But, within that you may also want to close your vows with a look toward your future lives together. Consider how your wedded life may look and talk about any hopes or dreams that you have for the two of you.

Start writing early 

You might think you have all the time in the world to write your vows, but may want to think again! This sentimental task will most likely take longer than you expect, so give yourself as much time as possible by starting early. Remember, you don’t have to write the whole thing in one go, and you certainly don’t want to rush through them! You can keep coming back to your vows until you get them right.

Practice!

Finally, it’s time to get some practice. The first time you read your vows shouldn’t be at your wedding. You can recite the vows in front of the mirror, use your wedding party as a practice audience, or record yourself saying them. Keep going until you know them by heart, but also feel free to bring notecards with you, if that reduces your nerves!

We know that there are so many details to plan for when it comes to your big day! But, you could say that the first dance is the last of the high impact formal events, before the party really gets started. But, if you happen to be someone who prefers to live life ‘out-of-the-spotlight’, the thought of getting up on the dance floor in front of all your friends and family can be a little anxiety inducing!

I mean…everyone’s eyes are already on you for the whole day! And, that’s especially true when you’re saying your vows, delivering speeches, then of course, for your first dance as a married couple! But, we’re here to tell you that doing your first dance doesn’t have to feel scary, even if you’re feeling a bit nervous about it at the moment!

With these few short tips, we think you’ll be able to relax and be present for the big moment, and maybe even enjoy it! So, that you can grace the dance floor (and all your guests) with a moment to cherish forever.

Pick a Personally Meaningful Song

Picking a song that has emotional significance to you as a couple can help calm those ‘all-eyes-on-you’ nerves. When you hear the first refrain, it can help take you to a place that blocks out all the external noise, and makes you focus only on your new spouse! Kind of like a scene in a romantic movie, when the couple is suddenly caught up in a moment and everything else around them seems to fade away. So, we advise you to pick a first dance song that makes you and your partner swoon a little. 

Make Sure it’s Not Too Long!

As much as you may love certain songs, length is a very important consideration when picking a first dance song, especially if you are feeling nervous! Meaning, a 3 minute song is much less intimidating than a 6 minute song! To gauge your comfort level with song length, we encourage you and your partner to dance to the songs that you are considering and see how you feel dancing together through them. 

A Little Practice Makes Perfect

If you and your sweetheart opt to go for a choreographed dance, you’ll certainly want to practice, but not too much! Overdoing the practice sessions might backfire and actually make you feel more nervous because you’re focused on perfection. Of course, you want your first dance to be great, but perfect isn’t necessary. No one is expecting a “Dancing With The Stars” level performance! We guarantee that you’ll have more fun if you don’t stress too much about the outcome! Everyone at your wedding is there to support you, and is going to think your dance was perfect anyway!

Be Present

After all, what really matters most about this day is the amazing person standing in front of you. So, do your best to focus on your new spouse and let the rest of the world fall away, and the dance will take care of itself! Remember, your nearest and dearest, didn’t really come to see your dance skills, they’re here to witness and celebrate the love between you and your new spouse!

When your friends and family members receive their invitations to your much anticipated wedding, they’ll excitedly start considering the perfect outfit for your big day, their travel plans (if necessary), and they’ll also start the search for the perfect wedding gift. But, what if you’d prefer not to receive any gifts? It’s important to share that information upfront with your guests, but it’s best to do so in a way that feels authentic and appropriate.

The truth is that many couples do not want to receive physical gifts from their guests. The reasons are varied and may include: already having everything they need/want in their daily lives, not having the space for the gifts, or maybe there are other goals or needs that they are already saving for. And that’s perfectly okay! But how exactly should couples navigate the wording on your invitations to reflect those wishes? 

Is It Really Appropriate to Ask for No Gifts?

First things first, the information you relay to your guests regarding possible wedding gifts will be based on what you may (or may not) love to receive. Meaning…If you feel like you already have everything you need, it’s perfectly acceptable to skip setting up a traditional wedding gift registry. The most important thing is to clearly communicate your wishes to your guests so there isn’t any confusion or hurt feelings.

One way to go about this is to include a card inserted with your invitation that offers specific details regarding gifts. Or, you can choose to include an insert directing your guests to a link and include gift details on a wedding website. It’s entirely up to what you feel is best. Just be sure you don’t include a “no gifts necessary” message printed on the actual invitation, as that can be seen as a bit of an etiquette faux pas.

What to Request Instead of Gifts

It’s best to offer an alternative to physical gifts, rather than a “no gifts” message, because a “no gifts” message is actually confusing to guests because it goes against their best instincts. After all, who wants to be the person to arrive at a wedding with nothing in hand?!

So if you’d rather receive money to put towards the future, as opposed to physical gifts, please include that information. Couples can make it clear they would prefer the gift of funds, without directly asking for cash, by setting up a Honeyfund page which can be used as a full wedding website or can be kept simple with a cash-based wish list of items or experiences they are looking to fund in their marriage. This list may include things like their honeymoon, date nights, paying off debt, or any other savings goal.

And, if you’re worried you’re committing a social no-no, rest assured that asking guests to contribute to a honeymoon or house fund is perfectly acceptable!  But if assistance in any of these areas isn’t necessary, you may want to consider asking for a donation to a charitable fund instead. To that end, you could ask your guests to donate to a charity that’s near and dear to your hearts, or request they donate to their own favorite charity.

‘No Gifts’ Wedding Invitation Examples

And, if you truly do not want your guests to gift you anything, whether a physical gift, contributing funds, or making a donation, make sure your wishes are clearly and concisely communicated.

– We’re excited for your presence, not presents. Please, no gifts.
– Your presence is truly enough, no gifts please.
– Thank you for being generous with your support and time, to that end, please just bring yourselves! No gifts necessary!

Planning a magical, heart-felt, tear-jerking ceremony is only half the battle when it comes to planning your wedding day! The reception is equally (or more)  important!  We know that your family and friends are there to witness and celebrate your love, but you also want them to have an amazing time at the party, too! One big way to facilitate that is to hire an excellent DJ (hint, hint) for your reception!

And, when it comes to a truly memorable night, we know that the soundtrack of your party plays a crucial role! But, while it’s true that hiring a great DJ can make or break your big day, remember that, that partnership is a two-sided street.

To that end, it’s up to you to clearly communicate your wishes in advance with your DJ. Don’t make the mistake of just playing it by ear.

So, if you’re not sure where to start, or what you should address with your DJ, below are the five most crucial things you should tell them before your big day. That way they can get the party started and keep it going strong all throughout the evening!

How to Pronounce the Names of Honored Guests

First things first: Decide who is going to introduce your and the entire wedding party for your grand entrance. If you decide to go with the DJ for the announcements, definitely give them a phonetic spelling of the names of the entire wedding party, especially if there are any unusual or hard to pronounce names (first or last) in the mix. You could even send a voice recording to your DJ so they can hear it clearly before your reception.

Whether or Not You Expect them to Emcee

Aside from introductions, let your DJ know if you’re going to require them to be the Emcee for the evening. Maybe you can’t decide on an Emcee from amongst your friend and family groups, or maybe you just don’t have anyone that is willing/able to take on the role. Either way, we recommend that you don’t spring this on your DJ when they arrive to set-up for your wedding reception! And, if you do decide to ask your DJ to emcee, make sure you share your preferences! Are you comfortable being the center of attention? Are there topics/ people to steer clear of? You may also alert your DJ to any strained relationships between members of your bridal party or family, including divorces or other things that could cause awkwardness. That way they can use the utmost care and sensitivity while interacting with those folks and in making announcements at your reception!

What Songs You Want for Your Important Moments

You absolutely want to fill your DJ in on what songs you’ve been thinking of for the major moments! These include your wedding party introductions, your first dance, the parent and child dances,the  cake cutting, the bouquet and garter tosses (if you’re doing them), and the last song of the night! This is crucial to avoid disappointment on your big day! 

Timing is also critical, and not just in regards to the actual day-of timeline and what songs to play when. For example… will you and your partner dance the full five minutes of your first dance song or do you want your DJ to fade it out at the three-minute mark? 

The Context for Song Requests

As opposed to just a general list of songs you’d like to hear, it’s almost more important  to provide some context for those requests. So if, ‘Hot In Herre’ by Nelly was your high school anthem and is guaranteed to keep all your friends on the dance floor, let your DJ know! This way, your DJ can get a better sense of what other songs, artists, or genres that will work for your guests! 

A Solid “Do Not Play” List

Oftentimes, the list of off-limit songs can be even more important than your ‘must play’ list! Especially if the DJ is open to taking requests from guests, which is something else you and your DJ have to discuss before your wedding! 

While we do suggest that you leave room for requests (within reason), don’t hesitate to list anything you hate, is associated with bad experiences in your life, or reminds you or your new spouse of a past relationship! The DJ can simply tell guests requesting those particular songs that he doesn’t have them available, or that the bride and groom have designated those songs as off-limits! Also be sure to get specific about language (eg, dirty words) and the volume preferences/requirements of the venue or guests. However, as a rule, we find that it’s always best to avoid explicit lyrics and language at your wedding!

You might be asking yourself, “What exactly is the wedding shoe game?!” and “Why should I include it in my reception?”

Well, keep reading to find out!

The Shoe Game is an ever popular and super fun and engaging wedding reception activity that tests just how well the newlywed’s know each other’s little quirks! The newlyweds will answer a variety of questions, all without seeing how their partner answers. Their only clue is gauging the audience’s reaction to the questions. The Questions tend to range from, who is the funniest to, who is the best cook, to who said I love you first, and who always steals the covers?!

The game is usually played when the meal is over and the toasts have been given, or in a bit of down time after dinner and before the formal speeches are delivered. But, no matter when you play it, this game is a quick way to get guests engaged and into the party mood! 

Alternatively, if this is part of your wedding plans, you could decide to play the game in between your live band finishing their performance and the DJ starting their set for the evening. And, as always, be sure to pick a time that best suits the flow of your party.

How to Play the Wedding Shoe Game

Step 1: Set-up

To play the Wedding Shoe Game, put two chairs back-to-back right in the center of the dance floor, on the stage, or directly in front of the head or sweetheart table. The newlyweds should then sit on the chairs so they can’t see one another. Then have both of them take off their shoes and swap one of them with their sweetie, so that each person has one of their own shoes and one of their partner’s.

Step 2: Pick a Game Leader

Now it’s time to pick a game leader. This person could be a guest, the reception emcee, someone in the bridal party, such as the best man or the maid of honor, or maybe even your DJ! Also, having both sets of parents alternate questions can be a fun addition to the game! Just make sure that whoever you choose is confident enough (and enjoys) to speak in front of a crowd and has a loud voice (or mic experience!). 

Step 3: Questions, Questions and More Questions

Now, here’s where the fun really starts! The game host starts asking the newlyweds questions one at a time. After each question, the caller will leave a short (or maybe dramatically long) pause, in which the couple answers the questions, the guests can react hilariously, and the videographer can preserve the moment for eternity!

Step 4: Raise the Shoes

Because it’s called the Wedding ‘Shoe’ game,  the couple doesn’t simply shout out their answers! That would be too easy! Instead, they raise the shoes in their hands to answer the questions. When a question is asked, they should raise the shoe of the person the question describes. For Example: “Who is more likely to fall asleep during movies?” Both partners would then answer by raising either their own shoe (because they’re the sleepy one), or their partners (because they are). 

Wedding Shoe Game Question Ideas

So, if that all sounds great and you want to play the Wedding Shoe Game, but aren’t sure where to start, we’ve compiled a list of possible questions for you. Typically the game host asks somewhere between 20-50 questions depending on just how long you want the game to go, and the amount of time you are filling in your reception schedule! 

Possible Questions:

Who made the first move?

Who said “I love you” first?

Who is the better cook?

Who cooks most often?

Who is most likely to binge-watch a show?

Who loves reading the most?

Who is the nerdiest one?

Who has the better hair?

Who is the first to apologize?

Who always thinks they are right?

Who is more romantic?

Who is more honest?

Who is more likely to get lost?

Who is more likely to stay late at work?

Who is more likely to be late for work?

Who has the sweetest tooth?

Who is the bigger shopaholic?

Who looks after the pets more?

Who talks the most?

Who talks the loudest?

Who is more serious?

Who spends the longest in the bathroom?

Who takes the longest showers?

Who takes the longest to get ready?

Who is the most adventurous?

Who is better at keeping secrets?

Who has the best taste in music?

Who has the best taste in films?

Who has the best taste in TV?

Who plans the best date nights?

Who is the better driver?

Who is the pickiest eater?

Who looks the best today?

Who is the most stubborn?

Who exercises more?

Who is the better dancer?

Who is the better singer?

Who takes up more than half of the bed?

Who is more organized?

Who has a better fashion sense?

Who chooses where you go for dinner?

Who does the household chores?

Who wakes up first?

Who stays up the latest?

Who is funnier?

Who is the cleanest?

Who makes all the plans?

Who is more outgoing?

Who is the better kisser?

Who is the flirtier one?